Couples Therapy
Relationships can become difficult for many different reasons. You may be experiencing ongoing conflict, struggling to communicate, feeling disconnected from one another or finding it difficult to move forward after a significant change or difficult experience.
Couples therapy offers a confidential space to explore what is happening in your relationship, understand the patterns you have become caught in and consider what might help things change.
What can couples therapy help with?
Couples come to therapy for many different reasons.
You might be:
Struggling to communicate or understand one another
Having recurring arguments or finding yourselves stuck in the same patterns
Feeling disconnected or less close than you once were
Experiencing difficulties with trust or intimacy
Navigating separation, including its impact on your children
Dealing with a significant life change that is affecting your relationship
Experiencing difficulties around parenting or family life
Feeling unsure about whether you want to stay together
You don't need to be in a crisis before seeking couples therapy.
It can also be an opportunity to strengthen your relationship, understand one another better and build a stronger foundation for the future.
How does systemic therapy work?
My method is integrative, drawing on evidence-based systemic, cognitive-behavioural and psychodynamic approaches.
Systemic psychotherapy helps couples understand the patterns in their relationship and how these influence the way you communicate and respond to one another. Rather than focusing on one person as the problem, we look at what is happening between you and what may be keeping you stuck.
We may want to think about your experiences growing up, since when couples feel trapped in a repetitive cycle, it is often because an emotional vulnerability is being triggered.
While you develop insight into your patterns and the role the past might be playing, I will also encourage you to take action straight away, to help you break the pattern by making specific behavioural changes.
What to expect
I believe the right intervention can sometimes bring insight and effective change quickly, so therapy does not always need to be long-term.
Sessions will initially be weekly and, as you progress, will become less frequent. This gives you time to try out new ways of interacting and take increasing ownership over the change process.
Most couples have a minimum of 8–12 sessions, spread out over 3–6 months.
If you or your partner have been impacted by mental health difficulties, trauma, racism or discrimination based on gender, sexuality or any other characteristic, we may decide to work more slowly and have additional sessions.
Frequently Asked Questions
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We will discuss what brings you to couples therapy and see if I feel like the right therapist for you. I will be interested in the perspective of each partner and will observe your dynamic, and ask a little about your history and your goals for therapy. I will share my understanding of your situation and provide an overview of the treatment plan I recommend.
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I recommend one individual session for each partner at the start of therapy, with subsequent sessions all couple sessions. If one partner also needs their own individual space, I would recommend a separate therapist.
I can also offer individual therapy for people who wish to explore their own difficulties with relationships, but where the goal is to repair and strengthen the relationship it is very beneficial to integrate this into the couple therapy.
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Yes, online is an option but I prefer meeting in person, especially in the early stages.
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Therapy sessions are 50 minutes.
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This varies depending on the degree of complexity and your goals. My aim is to help you make meaningful changes in the most focused and effective way possible, rather than keeping you in therapy longer than necessary.
Two or three sessions can be enough for some couples. Most will need 6-10. If you or your partner have experienced trauma, you may need more.
Systemic psychotherapy is flexible, and as you progress we will move to every two weeks, with final sessions spaced further apart and optional follow-up sessions at 3 or 6 months.
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Yes, I will suggest ‘homework’ between sessions, and may provide follow-up and feedback between sessions by email.
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My fee is £100 per 50-minute session.
Please inquire about reduced rates for lower income.
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I require 72 hours' notice for cancellations. Sessions cancelled with less than 72 hours' notice will be charged at the full session fee.
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I have a waiting list of 4-6 weeks but I also have cancellations so if you are in crisis, please get in touch.
Taking the first step
Reaching out for help can feel daunting, particularly when your relationship is fragile. You may worry about exposing vulnerable aspects of yourselves, or fear that therapy could make things worse or lead to changes you did not anticipate.
I am sensitive to how much is at stake and I am committed to providing the highest possible standard of care to the people I work with. I aim to provide a safe, caring, and compassionate space where we can explore your difficulties and come to a joint understanding about what could be different.